Social Duties

As for your 'public charges', these are all people entrusted

by God to your custody, such as children, wife, and slave, all

whom are part of your charge' It is your duty to guide them

to the performance of that which God has made obligatory

and the avoidance of that which He forbade. Beware of allowing

them to neglect an obligatory or conmit a forbidden act;

summon them to that in which their salvation and happiness in

the hereafter lies. Teach them courtesy and do not plant in

their hearts the love of the world and its cravings, for you

would thus have done them harm. It has been said that the wife

and children of a man shall clutch him before God and say: 'O

Lord! This one did not teach us Your rights upon us; therefore

give us retaliation from him!'

You must treat them with justice and graciousness' Justice is

to give them everything that God has made rightfully theirs in

the way of expenditure, clothes, and living with them charitably.

One ol its obligations is to take the wronged one's

rights from the unjust among them. In a hadith it is said that a

servant may be recorded as being a tyrant when he has power

over his family alone, that is, when he treats them

high-handedly.

As for graciousness, this is to treat them gently, and not to

be harsh in asking them for the rights assigned to you by God,

and to preat them with nobility, and to laugh with them at

times without falling into sin, in a manner that removes estrangement

and repugnance but maintains reverence and

respect.

You should forgive the wrongdoers among them and those

who offend you; absolve them inwardly, for what they may

have embezzled of your wealth you will [one day] find on the

side of good deeds [of the Balance]; it is not fitting that they

acquire punishment because of you, while you are rewarded

because of them. The Messenger of God, may blessings and

peace be upon him, was once asked: 'How often should a slave

Le forgiven each day?' and replied: 'For seventy mistakes.'

This forgiveness touches upon your rights over them, but

never those of God.

Imam Al-Haddad, Excerpt from The Book of Assistance, (Social Duties)