I find myself challenged in relationship matters yet once again learning about relationships, between man and woman.
I am getting through another period of relationship dilemma, one which I perceive is an important curve , learning to say what is necessary. Not to divulge anything not important or asked.
Subsequently, I am in retrospect, behaving in a most unusual manner, due to confusion.
Did I not think to be truthful and honest was good;to avoid further mishaps, miscommunications and future misunderstandings, one needs to know the full background?
I am learning that this is not always conducive to new relationships; that the past in not what matters. The future together based on the now, is vital. That to focus positivity on what can be built on what is available NOW is the point.
Thinking about this significance, takes me to a new level of awareness and appreciation.
To actually “dump” the past on a new relationship, is not fair, neither is it important. The past experiences has created the YOU NOW! Hence, the new YOU is who is going through the new relationship, gathering all wisdom and love from the self to input as an asset. Self improvement is thus, bringing new and greener pastures to what is the next opportunity in all aspects of life.
In relationships, we don’t need to have the CV of past relationships to be a candidate as future spouse and life partner. Enough to be who we are NOW. Unlike job prospects where we have to have the detailed account of past experiences.
“Keep the TRUST factor in perspective.”
Hence, keeping up positivity and awareness, open communication and forwardness, learning about what is permissible or acceptable, is a feat of genuine real relationship issues. Some want to know the past and will ask, those that don’t want to know about the past, will NOT ask. So, therefore, it is of no importance to the present relationship.
I am learning about this “procedure”. I find it a relief not to have to discuss past experiences. I am also learning that my future choice of partner, does not like, does not want to know and it is of no importance, not permissible to discuss nor divulge, personal past experiences. I am appreciated and loved as who I am NOW!
I need to be me, in who I am now, because that is what he is attracted to. Not the past which moulded me to who he can appreciate now. He does not have to know the technicalities of the makings of the ME he loves.
“Too much information, too much details.”
We are forever learning about ourselves, abilities, capacities and capabilities;creating awareness towards a person’s sensitivity in regards to “too much/many details” is something we need to keep in mind.
Unbeknown to me, not everyone is an open book or wants to read every page.
In my “innocence” , in wanting to make things quite clear, I may hurt someone or give the impression that the past life was an ambitious success having a string of amours. This is incorrect, we all make so many mistakes and grow apart. Like the saying I recently read,” Some people enter your life for a reason and others for lessons.”
Life is meant for loving and kindness, keep the communications open, let the love guide towards a more positive and proactive relationship, create a happy and positive ambience, respect each other for what you are. Make a balance. Show care and concern sincerely. Try to speak about everything instead of using technology like messaging to solve issues. I do believe in speech rather than messaging, I have found messaging creates a false sense of worry. The imagination can be our worse enemy.
That said, I wish all in their relationships, good loving, light and peace.
~Lorraine Nur~
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